| FRIENDS ONLY |
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| 12:47pm 26/08/2008 |
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mood:  creative music: lovedrug
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| 10:55pm 04/04/2005 |
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mood:  ecstatic
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okay so me n michael are officially TOGETHER :) im so freakin happy. yeah hes younger, and yeah im goin to college. but i mean if we both want it it'll work out...and hey guess what guys, we both want it lol. jamie says i moved on too fast, and yes that could be true but i've wanted this for a long time. and i LOVE michael. more than anything in this world. and thats something you cant just let walk away. he makes me happy, i make him happy...we are happy together. and so i think that certain people should jsut leave it alone and get over it. seriously...its my life i'll do as i may and if you have a problem with it then oh well. i mean yeah i hurt him in the past, and hes hurt me. but its different now...we BOTH want it. before it was either one or the other...but yeah i think imma go to CNU b/c its not too far away and i can have my car and so i can see my babyy :) hehe. and i mean i have to play putt putt with him or else my life will just be un-exciting lol. and i dont think i could live with my smoochies everynight and his smile. and i mean i feel beautiful around him no matter what. i could be wearing...well sweat pants, or jeans and a huge hoodie and he tells me how great i look. and i took like a oober long nap after a really long day and my hair was a mess and i looked basically like i did when i first wake up in the morning, and he didnt care. and he doesnt care that im a freakin whale. he doesnt think im fat...he loves me for me and nothing more and nothing less. and the fact hes so forgiving is what i love about him the most. he doesnt forget anything, but he doesnt hold a grudge either. and after all we've been through its hard to believe hes still around. but im so grateful and im not letting him go. hes my gummie bear lol cristina!!! oh and theres these two friends of mine that used to be best friends but had their differences and drifted apart, but its obvious they both miss eachother and i really want them to be friends again!! they know who im talking about but yeah!! i love you girls!! anyways im so indredibly happy right now...me n michael are talkin to eachother on tizzletalk. its hilarious. so imma so...just wanted to update :)
~Jennifer |
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| 12:23pm 30/03/2005 |
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Bold the ones you've seen.<Br>Put a "star"(*) next to the ones you liked.<Br>Add three to the end.<Br><BR>
01. Night at the Roxbury*
02. Shrek
03. M
04. Dogma*
05. Strictly Ballroom
06. The Princess Bride
07. Love Actually*
08. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
09. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
10. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
11. Reservoir Dogs
12. Desperado
13. Swordfish
14. Kill Bill Vol. 1
15. Donnie Darko
16. Spirited Away
17. Better Than Sex
18. Sleepy Hollow
19. Pirates of the Caribbean *
20. The Eye
21. Requiem for a Dream
22. Dawn of the Dead-the original, George Romero-directed film, that is
23. The Pillow Book
24. The Italian Job
25. Goonies*
26. Baseketball
27. The Spice Girls Movie
28. Army of Darkness
29. The Color Purple
30. The Saftey of Objects
31. Can't Hardly Wait
32. Mystic Pizza
33. Finding Nemo
34. Monsters Inc.
35. Circle of Friends
36. Mary Poppins
37. The Bourne Identity
38. Forrest Gump
39. A Clockwork Orange
40. Kindergarten Cop
41. On The Line*
42. My Big Fat Greek Wedding **
43. Final Destination ***
44. Sorority Boys***
45. Urban Legend
46. Cheaper by the Dozen
47. The Crow
48. The Princess and the Warrior
49. Seabiscuit
50. Hard Core Logo
51. Phantom of the Paradise
52. Zardoz
53. Lost in Translation
54. American Beauty
55. Big Fish
56. Starship Troopers
57. Starship Troopers 2
58. The Lost Boys
59. All About Eve
60. Showgirls
61. Swept Away
62. Star Wars: A New Hope
63. Black Hawk Down
64. Elizabeth
65. The Shawshank Redemption
66. Four Weddings and a Funeral
67. The Sound of Music
68. Notting Hill
69. Scotland, PA
70. Oxygen
71. Ringu
72. Shrunken Heads
73. Legends
74. About a Boy
75. Lilo and Stitch
76. Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
77. Pitch Black
78. Maid in Manhattan
79. Willow
80. Secret Of Nymh
81. Throughly Modern Millie
82. The Cutting Edge
83. Anna and the King
84. The American President
85. Save The Last Dance*
86. Grease
87. Dirty Dancing ***** best fugggin movie ever :)
88. Mad Love
89. Lantana
90. Kiss the Sky
91. Braveheart
92. Dark City
93. SLC Punk
94. Memento
95. In America
96. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory*
97. The Wedding Planner *
98. Empire Records
99. Edward Scissorhands *
100. Almost Famous
101. Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie
102. Star Trek Generations
103. Beyond The Mat
104. Transformers: The Movie
105. Scary Movie
106. X-Men *
107. Ghost
108. Changing Lanes
109. Hangman's Curse
110. Broken Arrow
111. Mona Lisa Smile
112. Moulin Rouge
113. The Ninth Gate
114. Emma
115. The Name of the Rose
116. Top Gun
117. Heartbreak Ridge
118. U-571
119. Ghost Ship
120. Johnny English
121. Dirty Dancing Havana Nights
122. The Fifth Element
123. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
124. Holes
125. The Pianist
126. Amelie ****wow guys i love this movie!!
127. Road Trip *
128. Miracle
129. Center Stage ***
130. Spider Man
131. Exorcist
132. Omen
133. 8 Mile
134. Son in Law
135. Stepmom
136. Dr. Strange love or how I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb
137. Full Metal Jacket
138. Lolita
139. Little Shop of Horrors
140. Annie
141. Rocky Horror Picture Show
142. Being John Malkovich
143. Monty Python & the Holy Grail
144. Street Fighter Alpha: The Movie
145. Under the Tuscan Sun
146. The Four Feathers
147. Gosford Park
148. Bubble Boy
149. Without a Paddle
150. Labyrinth
151. Shrek 2
152. Spiderman 2
153. X men 2
154. Ever After
155. Great Expectations
156. Orgazmo
157. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
158. Matrix
159. Underworld
160. Anchorman
161. Leon: The Professional
162. The Cooler
163. Head (1969)
164. Bridget Jones's Diary
165. Albino Aligator
166. Chasing Amy
167. The Usual Suspects
168. The Shape of Things
169. 13 Conversations About One Thing
170. Hero
171. Rules of Attraction
172. I (heart) Huckabees
173. Farenheit 9/11
174. Akira
175. Garden State
176. Ghost in the Shell
177. Kissing Jessica Stein
178. Sailor Moon: Super S
179. Adaptation
180. Punch Drunk Love
181. Mulan
182. Napoleon Dynamite
183. Pleasantville
184. Rat Race
185. Blue Crush
186. In Good Company
187. 13 Going on 30
88. Elf
189. Life Is Beautiful
190. Cruel Intentions
191. Princess Mononoke
192. Mallrats
193. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
194. Fight Club
195. Phantom of the Opera
196. First Knight
197. Alexander
198. Real Genius
199. Secretary
200. Quills
201. Detroit Rock City
202. Beetlejuice
203. Thirteen
204. Trainspotting
205. The Original Texas Chainsaw Massacre
206. Weird Science
207. Mean girls
208. The Bourne Supremacy
209. Dodgeball*
210. Meet the Parents
211. Meet the Fockers
212. Troy
213. Saw
214. The Passion of the Christ
215. Ray
216. Collateral
217. Coach Carter********************* this sis my most favoritist movie ever!!
218. Assault on Precinct 13
219. Hitch
220. Finding Neverland
221. National Treasure
222. Million Dollar Baby
223. Cellular
224. The Terminal
225. Mr. 3000
226. Head of State
227. Blue Streak
228. National Security
229. Rush Hour
230. Rush Hour 2
231. Shang Hai Noon
232. Shang Hai Knights
233. XXX
234. The Fast and the Furious
235. 2 Fast 2 Furious
236. The Last Samurai
237. Van Helsing
238. Ocean’s 11 *
239. Ocean’s 12
240. Men in Black
241. Men in Black II
242. I, Robot
243. Harold and Kumar go to White Castle
244. Zoolander
245. THe Wedding Date
.246. Pretty Woman
247. Snow White
248. Princess Diaries
249. Princess Diaries: Royal Engagement
250. White Noise
251. Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood
252. Practical Magic
253. The Notebook ****
254. The Pacifier
255. What A Girl Wants ***
256. National Lampoons Van Wilder |
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| 06:05pm 29/03/2005 |
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mood: excited
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hey guys i havent updated in ages. well i've been grounded for a while and i just got off restriction today. and yeah jamie and i broke up a lil while ago. but we still talk almost everyday. which is good. except people are sayin hes tryna fight michael and he better not have been lyin to me when he siad he didnt say that because im sorry but i'd be on michaels side. michael didnt do anything to jamie nor did he say anything about him so jamie has no reason to dislike him or fight him. i hate people like that. that are always tryna fight someone. but anyways. yeah i got my acception letter to CNU today which was exciting and im not grounded anymore which well at least i go thte computer and phone back. and hopefully that will mean that i get to drive again. i need to find a job so imma go job searchin one day this week. but i really miss michael and i wanna see him. i mean talking to him isnt the same as seein him. and when i was first grounded they talked like it was gonna be til i graduate and leave for school. but i guess seein as i just sat in my room and cried for a week they felt bad. and everytime they knew it was because i wanted to see michael. lol. i dunno i did a bad thing so i mean i understnad them grounding me i didnt try and fight it or anything i was just like okay. but im tired of being alone and sitting in my room all alone. its depressing and all i do is think about how much i miss michael and how much i wanna see him. *sigh* well imma go finish watching this movie. |
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| 07:58am 12/03/2005 |
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mood:  worried
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okay so...lets see...ummm...this weeks been pretty depressing. Lindsays daddy died and wednesday night i went to the wake. then i come home and michael tells me his papa died. then i lost it i just started cryin and really thinkin about things. i've lost 3 grandpas...and i only have one left. but i couldnt imagine losing my father, especially with the relationship we have now, or the lack there of. so yesterday was papa's funeral and since it was a half day for us i went to michaels after school and then rode with chris, greg and kacie and michael to the funeral home. but seeing michael hurt like he was, made me lose it again...i tried so hard to be strong and not cry but i dunno i just couldnt control it towards the end. i didnt know what to do or say, i just hugged him. but i realized that im not even close to being over him. i love him with all my heart. and i cant love anyone else...i will never love anyone quite like i love this boy. and that makes me feel so guilty...how can i possibly date someone when i still have these feelings for someone else? thats so unfair to jamie, and i dont want to hurt him. but i know its inevitable. but i think i just need time to get over michael...and let it go. even tho i've tried many times before. i really dont know what to do! im so happy with jamie..and what we have is great. but i sit there and i see michael and i know im still in love. and i know that if it was the other way around i dont think i'd like jamie feeling this way about another girl. but i dont wanna break up with him...i love his familly and friends and i love being around him and talking to him. but i dont love HIM quite yet...ya know? i care about him alot, which is why this is so difficult. sometimes i wish i could be a bitch n just leave him and not look back. but i cant do that...but i dont know what to do...what would you do?? :/ |
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| 07:19pm 05/03/2005 |
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mood:  bored music: TV
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One word, that's all you said
Somethin' in your voice caused me to turn my head.
Your smile, just captured me
And you were in my future as far as I could see
And I don't know how it happened, but it happened still
You asked me if I love you, if I always will
Well you, had me from "Hello"
I felt love start to grow
The moment that I looked into your eyes, you won me
It was over from the start
You completely stole my heart
And now you won't let go
I never even had a chance you know
You had me from "Hello"
Inside, I built the walls
So high around my heart, I thought I'd never fall
One touch, you brought it down
The bricks of my defenses scattered on the ground
And I swore to me I wasn't gonna love again
The last time was the last time, I let someone in
But you, had me from "Hello"
I felt love start to grow
The moment that I looked into your eyes, you won me
It was over from the start
You completely stole my heart
And now you won't let go
I never even had the chance you know
You had me from "Hello"
That's all you said
Somethin' in your voice caught me, turn my head
You had me from "Hello"
You had me from "Hello"
Boy I've loved you from "Hello"
click below to see my babyy's senior picture :) hehe. i sure do adore him!! hes the bestest thing thats ever been given to me. i swear hes sent from God. hes almost perfect. so close its unbelieveable. hes different from everyother guy in the aspect that he treats me with respect. something the others didnt. lol man im grounded and this sucks. i was supposed to see him today but nooo...michael had to get me in trouble. punk lol. j/p. last night me n michael went to the mall...n then we watched the notebook. n i cried lol. that movies so sad. for real. wanna know what else is sad...me!! lol because i miss jamie!!! :( im bout to watch this movie so i'll write more later.
( picture :) ) |
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| 05:17pm 04/03/2005 |
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okay people we need to get some stuff straight. i didnt say rodney likes me and is jealous of jamie. i said that he told me i had hurt him. thats it. so all you girls that like to start drama can shove it. seriously. i realize that ya'll dont have anything better to do. but my name needs to stay outta ya'lls mouths. my business doesnt concern you. yeah i write in this journal. but if you're gonna read it. dont take shit i say and twist it around to start shit. thats extremely childish and from what i recall we're in highschool now. grow the fuck up. thanks. |
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| this is how we do. |
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| 12:58pm 03/03/2005 |
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mood: loved music: switch-will smith
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mmk so jamie couldnt come tuesday lol...BUT last night we got to see eachother :D i went to his house, we chilled for a bit. amber was over there. she thought i'd be mad. but naw i like her and i know shes with josh and i know her n jamie werent doin nothin. then jamie n i went to rockville to see my familly. first we went n saw my daddy. then we went to my grannies and ate dinner there and played with the kids. jamie was holdin caroline...it was so cute. n cameron was like "are ya'll married?" and jamie goes "not yet" :D lol. but then we started talkin about our wedding if we ever did get married. but my familly loves him, and his loves me. so its great! hes the first guy ive introduced to my daddy n grandparents. and im the first girl his familly's met. :) n last night he was like "i sure hope you stick around b/c i've never dated anyone that all my familly and friends have liked" :) hes so sweet. n at grannie and pawpaws he was helpin clear the table and was all like "yes ma'am, no ma'am" it was cute!!! and well after that i had the bright idea of goin to the short pump mall instead of VCC since it was right there. yeah i forgot it was an outdoor mall!!! we were freezin our asses off. so we just left n went back to his house n chilled. then i went home...n i talked to him on the phone until like midnight. and i was already worn out from earlier. n i over slept this morning and missed first block..so im grounded now. lol. i havent been grounded in ages. bleh. but im still goin to the mall tonight with moma..and then i dunno me n michael were supposed to go to VCC tomorrow night. but i have NO GAS. so i dunno if thats happening. but i do wanna chill with my sherlock. n man last night i was talkin to rodney. that boy is so damn confusin. let me tell you, he had the nerve to say i hurt him. okay now. from what i recall...he played with my mother fuckin head like whoa. tellin me he liked me and shit. but then he went out with crystal for a day...still said he liked me. then the next thing i knew he ws with sunny. and then when we started chillin again and mess...he went back to sunny. and that boy doesnt know who or what he wants. i just gave up. but im always the bad guy no matter what happens. and im sorry if my being with jamie hurts him. but i fuckin deserve to be happy. and i am happy now. im finally happy. and all this drama is startin. figures. i get what i want right when i dont want it anymore. and if rodney felt that way about me...he should've fuckin said something. he flirts with everyone. so thats not gonna give it away. i mean really now. but its shitty because im losin a friend over this. im sorry but i was still there for him thru crystal..and sunny. and now hes just gonna get pissed. i was so incredibly hurt...but i still was his friend and i still cared. i still care. i mean i want the best for him. but he didnt stop and think about how i felt when he was with sunny. what goes around comes around. i knew one day this would happen. i remember playin Throwback by usher for him sayin one day he'd be singin that to me. well yep. gossssssssh. bleh this sucks. everyones mad about jamie. and its selfish of me not to care. but for once imma be happy. because i always try to please everyone BUT ME. i think me n jamie are havin ppl over at his house this weekend b/c his parents are goin outta town. i think bobby n stephanie, josh n amber, shawn and lisa, brian and whoever, corey, and maybe main. it'll be so fun :) omg and for prom. we're gettin a limo!!! woooot!!! its gonna be me n jamie, amber n josh, and stephanie n bobby. im so freakin excited. its april 23rd. not that far away! and i still havent bought my dress. and i need shoes...and i have to figure out what im doin with my hair. and i need to go to the tanning bed. and my step dad just walked by and smelled like straight weed. wtf man. whys he holdin out on us lol. j/p. well kiddos im gonna go take a nap til its time to leave. peace out.
~Jenn |
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| its about to be a girlfight |
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| 02:35pm 01/03/2005 |
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mood:  anxious
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so a friend of mine came to me and told me to read meagans journal entry from i guess yesterday. i found it very amusing and interesting at the same time. first of all anything that girl says about me comes back to bite her in her ass. anything i;ve done shes done...more times and with more guys...even more guys at one time. damn how about that one. so she call call me a whore all she wants...but news flash darlin what does that make you? secondly. i never intended on liking jamie mozingo. the first time we were supposed to chill was the night of the basketball game. and i too, find it ironic that he didnt come when he found out that meagan was gonna be there. but he felt bad and wanted to come all the way down here to chill with me. so i was like okay. and from that moment on things were just different. hes the sweetest guy i've ever met. he knows how to treat a girl. hes very considerate of my feelings. and i know hes not going to hurt me. but we just hit it off...and i cant help that. and im sorry but if i was tryna be with everyone shes been with then damn...thats alot of fucking guys i'd have to be tryna get with. and the whole charlie thing. funny how i liked that boy long before she even knew he existed so she can go somewhere with that one. and i mean he broke up with her for a reason and thats on her. and its not like i fucked him because that was her ex. i was fucked up, he was fucked up, one thing lead to another...shit happens. and its not my fault he called and called after that neither. i wasnt holdin a fuckin gun to his head making him do anything. yes, i did make a promise to meagan. but you know what. if shes gonna go run her mouth about me to all these people. then fuck her. and fuck that promise. why keep myself from being happy? and this girl isnt worth that. shes no friend to me. never really was. i thought for a while there we were but there i go thinkin again. lol. but yeah i like jamie. he likes me. and yeah shes right half of those promises was broken, he asked me out, and yeah i said yes. yes we hang out almost everyday and yes we're goin to his prom together. but really people get over it. its no ones business but mine and jamies. and i'd like to know how im fucking up her life?? i mean really. and im anxious to see how shes gonna ruin mine. because shes not takin jamie from me and shes not gonna take away my familly and my friends...so what is she gonna do??
and meagan. im sure you're reading this. you can talk as the shit you want to. but you're not gonna do shit. and if you do, it wont be just you. you cant hold your own. you have to have your "friends" there to have your back. and i'd really like to see you try to kick my ass. but you're not worth it. im not even gonna waste my time on you. im sorry that you cant be happy, so you dont want anyone else to be neither. and im sorry that you love to create drama. and im sorry that you're so insecure about yourself that you have to try and get everyone to hate me. but hun...you really need to grow the fuck up. im not fighting over a guy. jamies definately worth it. but shit i have him...you're never gonna...i dont have anything to worry about now do i? my life is perfect. and starting right now...you're no longer in my life. im not gonna stress you and im not gonna even think about it. you can talk about me all you want. but theres something called karma and its gonna hit you so damn hard one day. but i dont care anymore. because i know that at the end of the day, i have something great to come home to. and what do you have? surely not true friends because when one of your "best firends" comes to me and is on my side what does that say? and you can sit around and hold grudges all you want. but thats gonna be on your shoulders not mine. you really need to get over it and move on. im sorry that it upsets you that jamie and i are together. i didnt intentionally go out and make myself like him just because you dated him. why waste the time? im sorry but im not that pathetic. and the thought of him and you together makes me naucious at times, so if anything that'd be a reason to stay away. but... love works in mysterious ways. and maybe the only good thing we got outta knowing you was eachother. so for that i thank you.
anyways guys sorry this is so long! just had to get some things off my chest. this will be last that you hear about this from me. im done. jamies coming in like an hour :) so im happy about that one. i havent seen him since sunday lol. i miss him!! i think we might be goin out to dinner. but Danny's makin some yummy food tonight so we may just chill at my house. who knows. we never know what we're gonna do. as long as we're together thats all that really matters. oh yeah and i picked out my prom dress!!! well one of them...its so cute!!! :) well i have to go straighten my room and get ready. peace out kids.
~Jennifer |
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| 09:33pm 27/02/2005 |
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mood: chipper music: Andy Griggs
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okay so this weekend was grand. jamie made up for ditchin me friday night. n he came down n stayed with me all day til like 12:30 :) he told his mom i was gonna spend the night and she was like "okay...wheres she gonna sleep...the couch?" it was too funny. so now we've got to formulate a plan. so that my mom will approve as well. shes wack tho. but yeah we went to amber deatons last night. n jeremys for real mad at me b/c of jamie. but i mean the nigga didnt like me til i started talkin to this boy so i mean wtf. n i had alot of fun last night with jamie. n something great happened today. and mean it was **great** i just cant say what it was...okay maybe i can. i met jamies familly and they love me. we went to lunch for his grandparents birthday. n his grandparents hugged me bye n his grandma kissed me. n his aunt n uncle hugged me too. i had so much fun. playin with chelsea and eatin with the familly n talkin to his uncle. haha his uncle asked how jamie n i met. that was an interesting story to tell. i said "well it started off as him bein a butthole to his ex, who used to be my friend. so i yelled at him. then we kept talkin occasionally. and then we planned to chill one night and he stood me up. then he came like 2 days later and saw me. and i was like and the moment i saw him i knew he was different than everyone else. and we just kept on hangin out and we cant get enough of eachother." n his uncle wayne goes "he stood you up n your still seein him?" i was like yeah hes worth it. :) n chelsea is too cute lol. she wanted to sit bye me n the car n at the resturant lol. n poor jamie was gettin annoyed by her. n i was like its fine i like playin with her. friday night we kissed :O it was beautiful lol. im sucha dork. yeah im really startin to like this nigga. we were just layin in his bed watchin a movie today...super troopers lol. funny ass movie..anyways we just lay there n we kept lookin at eachother n smilin...n hed lean over n kiss me. its cute man. n he calls me his girl now lol. hes been my boy to jeremy n randy for like a week now lol. which is ironic. anyhoo after the movie we umm...went to amber n joshes and chilled. fun times. josh was bein really nice to amber and they wont fightin at all. so hes not on my bad side anymore. n coreys goofy ass was there. that boy trips me up. hes always makin me laugh. jamie too. they both have that smartass sense of humor. silly boys. lol. but im gonna go lay down n wait for this nigga to call me. see ya...wait hes callin now perfect timing lol. laters.
~Jennifer |
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| wow |
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| 11:26am 26/02/2005 |
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mood:  cranky music: Trillville
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umm last night was so messed up. i was so extremely pissed off. at jamie and jeremy. i mean it was good at first. i went to highland springs then jamie n i went to the mall n i got some cuteness. and then we went to his lil sisters talent show. let me tell you that girl can sing!! she sand that hillary duff song why not. it was too cute. then we left after she sung n went to his house n chilled. until like 9:20. then he left me to go be with his friends. i mean i wasnt really mad b/c i didnt wanna keep him from his friends n all. but i mean he was all like i dont want you to go when i was about to leave n we were sayin goodbye. wtf man if he didnt want me to go then why was he makin me. seriously. that makes no sence. n then he called last night and was like i always wanna be with you. and i was thinkin yeah except for tonight. but i think hes comin here today. who knows he might be with his friends. which im not complaining but he better not make a habit of leavin me for his friends. well then seeeing as my ass was gonnna be home early as shit i was gonna go chill with jeremy n sara b/c jeremy had been sayin he wanted to chill. then the nigga ditched me too. right after he was sayin how messed up jamie was. n jeremy is so shady man. he never likes me until i find someone else n then he puts it all on me like im denyin him. and i cant handle this stress right now. im already havin drama from meagan...the stress of tryna choose between two guys. the one i love or the one thats practically in love with me. i mean what would you do? michaels so damn fickle. i really am tired of playin games, and im startin to want nothing to do with him. but theres always that chance that tomorrow he might like me too. but i dunno. seriously. i wish i hadnt met jamie sometimes. he so damn good to me n he makes everything hard. and he sure has caused alot of drama lately. between me n michael n me n meagan n me n jeremy. but when im around him or talkin to him that shit doesnt even faze me. its all about jenn n jamie. and i really enjoy bein with him n talkin to him. and hes such a gentleman. and hes so effin perfect. theres nothin wrong with him. im seriously about to be like fuck that promise i made meagan n just be with the boy. actually FUCK THAT PROMISE. if he asks me out eventually then imma say yes. because i deserve to be happy. n so does he. n now im sure all you haters are gonna go talk shit but who really cares? im not gonna let it bother me no more. bleh. i hate girls. boys are so much better to chill with n talk to. they dont care bout all this nonsense drama. k so i just talked to jamie. and i cant be mad at that boy lol. hes goin to play basketball with caleb. and then we MIGHT chill tonight. i dun even know. but i have to go get ready to get my church pictures done bc its 12:33 already!! whoa!
~Jennifer |
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| 09:48pm 24/02/2005 |
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mood: grumpy music: TV in background
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mmk so this week has been interesting. lets see jamie came over sunday n we went to saras and then to my house n watched the game...the EAST won...yea baby!...no school monday so i went to highland springs to chill with jamie n his friends. they're so awesome. ambers cool as shit...lisa...well i didnt talk to her much. stephanie is my new mary kay lady n shes cool too. corey...hes a cutie lol...n ambers boyfriend...i just dont like the way he treats her. so yea im not too fond of him. anyhoo. i was sad i didnt get to see jamies lil sister n his parents but i guess i'll see them tomorrow. tuesday i went to saras after school n watched american idol. then wednesday mornin at 7 i was supposed to have a job interview but the lady never showed up. so i went back after school and she said she was sorry n all and to come back friday at 3:30. so ill be there tomorrow at 3:30 lol. i picked michael up from school yesterday and we went back to his house n rented SAW and watched that. omfg it was nasty. he was scared lol. but we snuggled n held hands it was cute. i was happy lol. then i went to church then to saras n fell asleep. so i came home n talked to my buddy all night. oh yeah n jamie asked me to go to his prom with him. i was happy lol. michael said it was fine. which is good b/c its just as friends and so i was hopin michael wouldnt be mad. n he wont so thats goood. lets see today...umm went to pick saradee n michael up from schoool. then sara n me got our nails done. n we TRIED to put highlights in my hair but it didnt work to well. its just a whole lot lighter now lol. umm now im here typin this. lol. tomorrows friday!! woot. jamie n i are goin to the mall. so i can get my shoes. then we're gonna chill in highland springs. so im excited. saturday mornin i have key club shit from 7-10. and then i have church pictures at 2. so it'll suck lol. n sunday i dunno what im doin. but i know im not gonna see michael all weekend and that saddens me. :( i never see him. hes goin to the mall with jennifer crane. i wish he'd stop likin her. for real. why does she have to be so pretty. geez. bleh well im goin to bed i think b/c im tired as mess.
~Jennifer |
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| 12:45pm 20/02/2005 |
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mood:  contemplative music: differences
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okay so this weekend has been the best in a while, yet the most confusing one EVER. friday night Jamie and i went to the movies. i drove to highland springs, then he drove to the movie theater. i met his parents and his little sister too! i was so nervous. but they're really nice. and his lil sister is mad cool. she has a big huge hampster!!! =O lol. well we went n saw hide n seek. that was scary!! the ending was weird tho. both of us were like wtf!?!? oh and before it started, these girls were loud as mess talkin and laughin and so me n jamie were laughin AT them not WITH them. wow. then in the middle of the movie the thing cuts off so we had to wait a while for the movie to start up again. n then after the movie he took me to my favorite place to get my favorite thing...WENDY'S CHICKEN NUGGETS :) he's a keeper lol. but then we just sat there n ate n talked. and it was fun. he has these killer eyes man. so so gorgeous. and his smile is too. oh yeah haha now i have to cover up my face everytime i smile b/c jamie likes it so i know hes lookin at me. n i get all embarassed!! lol. well back at his house we watched 8 mile. and it was on vh1 so there were these really weird commercials. and so i was just laughin at all of them. he prolly thought i was crazy. but they were dumb as crap which made them funny. like the dance dance revolution and karoke revolution commercial hahaa omg. that was too funny. then we watched jackass and were both laughin real hard. yeah it was so much fun. i didnt get home til like almost 1:30 and i got in trouble with danny. umm i am 18 lol. w/e.
THEN LAST NIGHT: michael wanted to chill. so i went and got him then we attempted to go to the mall. but we kinda got lost. missed the exit or something. but opps?? haha. so we stopped n asked directions but them people didnt know what they were talkin about. so i called katiebugg and she got us un-lost. THANKS A TON KT!!! so then we finally got to the mall and i got depressed because we saw all these really cool shoes that i wanted. but michael picked out some real cute ones. and no not the lebron james'. lol. so then we went in spencers and hes gross thats all i have to say. oh and we went to target and were playin with this big green ball and i love that thing. so im seriously gonna go back and get it. then michael walked away from me...or did i walk away from him? i dunno well i couldnt find him b/c he was being gay n hidin. and so i walked around like an idiot tryna find him. then we went n got me a diet coke at wendys...and ATTEMPTED to go home. lol. the thing is i got home perfectly fine last night and the night before. so i dont know why it was so difficult. but we ended up taking a tour of charles city. and then there was a detour thing we had to take and wow it took forever. but i thought it was fun b/c we had no clue where we were and it made it exciting. then we got back to his house and we watched the slam dunk contest. that was pretty neato. then when it was time for me to leave, he wouldnt let go of my leg. i mean he wont too interested til i had to go. and so for like 10 min i tried to get loose and leave. and he wouldnt let me. so again last night i was late getting home. but oh well lol. i am 18 and they need to treat me like i am. but i dunno when we werent arguin i was happy to be with him. and i was ina way like old times. and im glad i got to hang out with him. im sure it wont happen again. but okay. oh and he brought back the laugh...:D i think its a sign!
~so in conclusion to two mad fun nights. im confused now. jamies so sweet! hes funny and nice and a little shy but thats okay. and he actually cares about my feelings and when im upset hes always there to talk to. (i wish he was home now so i could talk to him.) but yeah. im so in love with michael. and he's just everything i want. and more. the only problem is i dont know what hes thinking..and what he wants. he sends so many mixed signals that its hard to tell. n now i dunno what to do. im not tryin to hurt jamie. i just know that if it comes down to it and i have to choose then im choosin michael. and im scared thats gonna hurt jamie...but i love hangin out with him and talking to him. and i dont wanna lose a friend. *sigh* im such a loser. :( |
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| where did i go wrong? |
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| 01:50pm 17/02/2005 |
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mood: stressed music: usher-nice n slow
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You are Foreplay
What kind of sex are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
okay the last time i wrote in here was during my like 5 day relationship with luke. hmm...yeah...about that. well i wasnt feelin it and i talked to him about it and he convinced me to give him a chance and what not. but then he decided to go to VA beach with a bunch or girls and do some acid n shit. so i was like oh hell no n ended that. plus i mean...it wasnt right i wasnt happy and i still love michael and im certain its not going to feel right with anyone but him. and so i guess imma have to wait around for him. lately we've been talkin more and he calls me like everyday now. which is progress...so im happy about that. except i dunno...he hurts me alot without realizing it. everytime we're supposed to hang out he ditches me n does something else and that shit hurts. n little things he syas just tear me apart. n its like he doesnt want nothin to do with me. but then he assures me its not like that and we make more plans...but yeah...who knows. whatever happens happens is all i have to say. i mean if we're meant to be together like he once thought and i currently think...then we will be. i cant force it. and honestly im tired of tryin. i've NEVER had to try this hard to get a guy. and i know its all my fault...but i mean i dunno. if he was so convinced then, why isnt he now? He was the one that stopped talking to me this time...he started likin jenny hunter and stopped talking to me b/c he was always talkin to her or with her. and i tried to still talk and mess. maybe hes just tryin to put me thru what he went thru so i can see first hand how he felt. and if he felt like i do now, then i guess i see why he just stopped talkin to me. everyday i want to just give up and let it all go. but im not a quitter and i've come so far and i dont want to give it up. but i bet if i find someone else in the mean time...hes gonna finally want me again...then imma be screwed. i would drop everything for michael. and thats the truth. so i guess im not gonna date nobody else. i dont want anyone to get hurt. but theres this friend of mine that i have...n me n him are gettin pretty close and we hung out the other day and i had so much fun. and hes like replaced what michael used to be. when i was sad and needed to talk i used to go to michael...and now i go to my friend. and he listens and gives advice...and he thinks i should just be done with michael all together. alot of people do actually. but i dont wanna be. i wanna be with michael and no one else. and i wont be happy until im there. and if im never there then gosh i dunno. but no one has ever made me feel as good as he used to. and i remember every minute we spent together and all those memories replay in my head every day. and when we talk im happy...well when we're not fighting. we seem to do that alot. over dumb stuff too. and it kills me. hes always gotta have an attitude n get smart and i take it the wrong way. and im so stupid because right in front of me is someone that treats me so good and likes me and thinks im great...and he actually drops his boys to drive an hour just to see me. and michael cant even keep plans that we make. n he takes me for granted. because i'll wait...but im not waiting forever. eventually imma get fed up and just give it up. because im tired of crying and tired of hurting and definately tired of stayin up all night waiting for the call he promised that NEVER comes. bleh. n now meagan said she doesnt wanna be friends no more b/c of jamie. and its not that serious. jamie and i hardly know eachother...and IM FUCKING CRAZY ABOUT MICHAEL. am i really tryin to have another 5 day relationship b/c i realize i want someone else? umm not really. jamies so sweet and hes mad cool and i love talking to him and hanging out and mess. but i really dont wanna hurt him. and he does live in highland springs and thats a long distance relationship and they dont work out too well. but i dunno like i said whatever happens happens. maybe i will start liking jamie too and get over michael and be happy without him. but thats not happening anytime soon thats for sure. im sure you people that read this dont really care about my pathetic love life...well its actually nonexistant. but i needed to vent and i figured this was the best way. bleh if any of ya'll have any advice or anything as to what in the world i should do...PLEASE TELL ME. im so confused right now. and it gets worse everyday. arrg...im gonna go lay down b/c im really tired!!!
~Jennifer |
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| 04:24pm 10/02/2005 |
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looking back on the entries since i met rodney...hes mentioned in every single one about how much i like him and how hapy he makes me and so on. well...thinking about it now. when i am with rodney or was with rodney everything just felt right. and in place like thats where i was supposed to be and thats who i was supposed to be with. call me crazy if you wanna but thats how i feel. and i know that im never going to love again and i have this feeling lukes going to end up fallin in love with me and i cant deal with that. im not falling in love anytime soon. i dont want to and i wont let myself. because im tired of getting hurt. and its either they hurt me or i hurt them and im not up for that. im going to school in a few months and i dont want to start anything too serious. i need to focus on that and nothing else. although everyone knows that i've had my heart set on *him* forever now. and honestly hes still the one i want to be with for the rest of my life. hes the only one for me. lukes such an awesome guy and all and hes so good to me. almost too good to me. i mean he came over and made me soup b/c im sick. but i dont wanan fall in love again. i dont wana hurt anyone or get hurt again. and its not fair that i still love someone else...so i dunno what to do. i tried to talk to him about it...but that got no where all it did was get him to comeover again today. does the boy ever get tired of seeing me? geez.i dont know i dont think i can handle this much longer. but he doesnt understnad that. :/ |
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| ladies night out |
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| 12:41am 09/01/2005 |
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mood: depressed music: happy-ashanti (it doesnt fit the mood tho)
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okay so it was ladies night out. we were supposed to have a drama free night and have tons of fun. but bitches had to mess it up. i was real close to fighting megan. for real im so sick of her shit. she can fuck me over...and do wahtever she wants to me. but hurting nichole and erin crosses the line. stupid bitch. i really wanna kill her. i tried to call her n talk to her but she cant hold her own and made dawn answer. real classic. whatever...but yeah me n nichole n erin went to hooters...yumm!!! and then to coldstone....even yummier...and then to the bowling alley. hooters was fun lol we took pictures and laughed and talked and had alot of fun. and we got to look at extremely hot cowboys at the table next to ours. that was great :) then at coldstone the guy was oober funny and made us laugh. and i got to see BRANDON at the bowling alley. i was so happy. lol. hes so gorgeous. but i mean i doubt he'll ever like me. no one ever does. i swear theres something majorly wrong with me...because i cant ever get a guy. and it sucks. i've been single for a really long time...and its fun..but i miss having someone to hold me. and i need that. i keep thinking about the time me n michael were laying in his hammock. i was so happy then and now i want that. but its all so complicated. i cant get over rodney...and well brandon will never like me b/c im like extremely hideous. and well michael owens. what to say about that. umm...the tables have turned...and now i know how he felt...and its shitty. and i hate it. i really miss him. and he told me he was afraid to talk to me because he ws scared he was gonna fall for me again. but after all this time. he was right. age doesnt matter. but oh well. too late now. i had my chance twice and i blew it. but i only have 21 days until i turn 18 and get a car. and then i can see him more and hopefully we'll become best friends again...but who knows? i do know that im getting him kick butt shoes and hes getting me a jersey for our birthday presents lol. even tho his was like 4 months ago. but hey...better than nothing at all right? lol. now im talkin to erik the dood that went bowling with us...hes so cool...he thinks im cute haha...seee....
acoustic love x3: hey this is nicholes friend jenn
UggGoodCaveman: boo!
UggGoodCaveman: whats shakin bacon
UggGoodCaveman: Bob or Gangsta?
acoustic love x3: haha nuttin much lol im tired
acoustic love x3: ohh gansta
UggGoodCaveman: Ah
UggGoodCaveman: The tiny one
UggGoodCaveman: Cute
UggGoodCaveman: but tiny
acoustic love x3: aww thanks
UggGoodCaveman: lil miss stalker
UggGoodCaveman: You best not be stalkin me now.
acoustic love x3: yeah...lol i wanted to bowl nest to him
acoustic love x3: but noooo
acoustic love x3: haha no ur nicholes man
UggGoodCaveman: Was I not good enough?
UggGoodCaveman: sheesh
UggGoodCaveman: score
hehe...hes so perfect for her!!! i want them to get married and have babies. haha wow. im tired. and going to bed. later gator.
~Jenn |
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| 11:29pm 07/01/2005 |
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ummm okay...me n jordy n brandon went to the game. i sat with rodney the whole time...well him and brandon....my too favorite people lol. they're so funny together. i love it. but yeah rodney is wow. i cant even explain it. he makes me go crazy!! but i did see my sexxxay michael lol. new kent won so he was so happy and he was all talkative and nice tonight. he was like why didnt u sit with my moma...man i for real wanted to like normal...but i didnt see her. i was mad....but i got to talk to her after the game. i love her. i know that when i get a car imma be over there like 24/7. hah. i love my lil mikey owens. lol theres no one out there for me except him. wow. brandons so sweeeet. we went n chilled with his brother and his friend shadow...that was so fun. my stomach hurt from laughin...it was great. and tomrrow im goin bowling and they're gonna be there. wow thats gonna be fun!! but im tired n goin to bed. later kidds.
~jennifer |
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| yawn |
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| 03:20pm 06/01/2005 |
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mood: crushed music: nice n slow-usher
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okay so yesterday was a good day...i sat with the boys at lunch, which cheered me up...justins a sweetie lol. classes were good...nothing really went wrong. except i had a migraine...but i kept day dreaming and my headache didnt bother me much...rodney is good for the soul...lol he makes me so happy. even if we are just friends. but like he said, we're really good friends now and im glad. well after school ben n hannah gave me a ride home...i took a nap...got ready to go back to the school...we did our project, then i got to see my lil mikey owens and his sexxxay tale play ball. lafayette totally domintated...i didnt know we were that good lol. but i got to see michael and that made me happy. then...i was standing outside and i went to go talk to quinton and he was talking to this guy and i was thinkin "man hes cute" and then i started talking to the guy and ironically it was rodneys friend brandon. lol. hes really nice. well moma picked me up and we went n got me some chicken nuggets from wendys...thats like all i ate yesterday, i was hungry as a champ. then we went home...i called rodney...and he was on the phone with his girl...so he said he'd get online. and he did :) and i got to talk to him. found out that he goes with sunny, his ex, whom lives in newport news. but he loves her...and so im happy for them. except shes moving to penn...dunno when but i feel bad for him. its like his second relationship in 2 days thats not really gonna work out. but yeah...he and i talked. i love the boy to death lol...im so glad i didnt stop talking to him. i couldnt sleep last night tho. i stayed up til like 3 thinking...and then i guess i dozed off...but i woke up no problem this morning and got ready. went to school...the like first person i notice as i walk into school is brandon...i stopped and talked to him and josh...so i finally said hey to josh haha. cept brandon was like all over lauren, so i guess perhaps theres something between them?? i dunno tho. and i saw brandon like 3 times today...funny how i'd never seen him before...either that or i never really noticed. but oh well. hes a cool kid from what i know so far. oooh im staying the night with nichole saturday and we're going bowling. let me tell you i cannot bowl..so i know shes gonna win. plus i havent bowled in years. this should be interesting. im excited lol. 24 days until my birthday :) i better be getting some groovy gifts!!! heh! later kiddos.
~Jennifer |
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oh_so_passe's journal
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